Heaven Help Us
by soyxunxperdedor
Summary: Dean literally confronts himself about Castiel and then fixes the problem.  Destiel


There were many things Dean Winchester wanted to ask himself about the future, but truth be told he was scared to find out the answers. In the short amount of time he'd been with his future self he'd already discovered too many things, such as Sam becoming Lucifer's bitch and the fact that Castiel does more drugs in one day than Guns N Roses did in their entire career.

Of all the questions he had for himself there was one that burned brighter than all the rest, and it was about the drugged up angel. So when it seemed that the two hunters would have a few minutes alone, Dean acted.

"We need to talk," he said as they entered the ammo storage room in the small camp. Future Dean glanced up at him, but then continued perusing the bullets. Finally he stopped, and looked at Dean, not saying anything but clearly waiting for him to continue. "It's about Castiel."

"Look, if you're gonna ream me for letting him get like this, with the orgies and the drugs, don't bother. When the other angels left and he lost his grace he, I don't know, broke I guess."

"You and I both know that's not what I want to talk about."

Future Dean sighed. "Yeah, I never did perfect the art of fooling myself," he leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest, resigned. "What do you want to know?"

"Did you ever, y'know…Tell him?"

Future Dean snorted. "Dean, if you haven't noticed, we're in the middle of the damn apocalypse. That's no place to try to figure out any kind of relationship, especially one that's man on man."

Dean stared into the hard green eyes and wondered if his own were that uninviting or if that had happened in the years between them. "Five years and you haven't been able to get past the guy thing? If you haven't noticed, we're kind of the same person. I know how you feel about him, because I feel that way too. There's something you're not telling me, I can see it in your eyes. You were right, we've never perfected fooling ourselves."

Future Dean looked away, unable to meet his own eyes. "After Sam said yes in Detroit I broke. I tried to get Michael to take me but he wouldn't, he'd found another vessel. I begged him. Cas was there. He saw me at my weakest point and dammit he just held me while I cried over Sam. I can't be that vulnerable to a person, you should know that. When you're vulnerable, they can hurt you when they leave."

"But Cas never left. He stayed by your side even though that meant losing his grace. But we couldn't even tell him we loved him?" Dean was disgusted with himself, both present and future. "I have to make this right," he said, running from the ammo shed. His future self didn't even try to stop him, because maybe the man he used to be could accomplish something he never had.

He ran straight to Castiel's and barged in. Luckily for him Cas was not in the middle of one of his orgies. He was however sprawled across his bed, clearly stoned. Cas looked up at him with glassy eyes. "Ah, Dean. Good, you're the nice one. To what do I owe this pleasure?"

Dean didn't speak, he just crossed the room in a few quick strides, took Castiel's face in his hands and kissed him before he could think himself out of it. The angel didn't hesitate to return the kiss, grabbing Dean by the collar and pulling him onto the bed. Their kiss went on for minutes, and for a moment it seemed like it would never end. But then Castiel came to his senses.

"Dean. What are you doing?" he gasped, pulling away. Dean sat up, feeling stupid for coming here.

"I'm sorry Cas. I shouldn't have done that," Dean made a move as if to leave, his face burning with embarrassment, but Castiel grabbed his sleeve, holding him in place on the edge of the bed.

"I gave you the wrong impression, Dean. I am quite glad that you did that. I would just like to know why." Dean gazed into Castiel's impossibly blue eyes and smiled.

"I did it because I love you. I hate myself, and by that I mean the future dick me, for not ever telling you that. Zachariah sent me here so I could do things right. And while I'm sure he didn't mean this, it matters to me, and I want to make it right between us."

Castiel smiled. "Your eyes are so much softer than his," he said, dragging Dean back down for another passionate kiss. They pulled back for air at the same time.

"Cas…"

"Yeah?"

Dean kissed Cas's neck before answering. "I want you," he panted against the angel's soft skin.

Castiel gave Dean a mischievous grin, something Dean had never seen before but loved all the same. He raised his head, taking the hunter's earlobe between his teeth and biting it softly, sending a shiver up Dean's spine. He let go of his ear but kept his mouth on it. "Then have me," whispered before darting his tongue lightly into Dean's ear.

Dean pushed the angel down so that he was flat on his back in the middle of the wide bed. He quickly yanked his jacket off and tossed it in the floor, then straddled the angel's hips. Castiel was wearing a burgundy button-up shirt that looked great on him, but Dean had a feeling it looked even better on the floor. He slowly undid the top button of the shirt, but very quickly lost patience with that, choosing to literally rip it off instead, sending buttons everywhere.

"Hey," Castiel protested. "That was my favorite shirt…"

"I'll buy you another one," Dean growled, silencing further protests by occupying Cas's lips. Dean ran his hands all over every square inch of bare flesh he could find, grinding his hips against the angel's. Castiel ran his hands up Dean's shirt, feeling the hunter's abs. He began moving his own hips in a rhythm with Dean's.

Dean's jeans could be almost uncomfortably tight on a regular basis, but now they were excruciatingly binding. He propped himself up on one arm, trying not to break rhythm with his hips or contact with Cas's mouth while he undid his belt buckle. Castiel felt the fumbling, so he stopped roaming his hands over Dean's torso, instead pushing the hunter's hands away and taking the belt off for him, and not stopping there. He unbuttoned and then unzipped the jeans, pushing them down Dean's thighs.

Dean took control again, kicking his boots off and taking his jeans completely off. Next went his shirt. He sat back on his heels, wearing nothing but a pair of grey boxer-briefs, still straddling Cas's hips. He gazed down at the angel. "Those pants have to go."

"I like them, take your time." Dean grinned at the invitation. He unbuttoned the pants and then ever-so-slowly pulled the zipper down. His knuckles grazed Castiel's erection and the angel let out a small gasp. Dean pulled the angel's pants off, revealing a pair of deep blue silk boxers that were barely containing his excitement.

Dean ground his hips against the angel's again, moaning at the sensation of their lengths touching. He had waited so long for this, but the Castiel that he was with right now had waited longer. Dean let his lips roam over Cas's neck and shoulders, occasionally biting playfully. Castiel's hands found Dean's muscular back, digging his nails in hard enough to make the hunter shiver.

Dean bent his head and licked the angel's nipple, causing Castiel to tense. Dean noticed, and he teased it with his tongue. Cas groaned. "If you want me to last you won't do that," he said, biting the hunter's earlobe again.

"Maybe we should…" instead of finishing his sentence he just gave Castiel a knowing look. Castiel immediately understood, but then took Dean by surprise by flipping him over onto his back, and then straddling him so that they were the opposite of what they had been.

"Man I love the new you!" Dean said with a wide grin. Castiel kicked his boxers off and yanked Dean's underwear down. He leaned down and licked Dean's erection from it's base to it's tip. Dean arched his back and moaned loudly. His chest rose and fell erratically and Castiel's breathing was labored as well. The angel leaned over the naked hunter, grabbing a bottle off the bedside table. He poured some lube into his open palm and gently worked it over Dean's length. The hunter moaned and squirmed under the angel.

Castiel stopped, leaning down to suck Dean's bottom lip into his mouth. "Are you ready?" he murmured.

"Won't this hurt you?" he asked the angel, concern in his eyes.

Cas let out a little laugh, and Dean loved that sound, although he didn't hear it often. The angel kissed Dean's neck, "Did you think my orgies only involved women?"

Dean cocked and eyebrow in surprise but didn't question it. The angel kissed Dean's full lips and, without hesitating, slid himself down onto Dean's erect member. They gasped with pleasure simultaneously. Dean rocked his hips upward and Castiel mimicked his rhythm. Dean's heartbeat was so fast he thought his heart might burst. Cas picked up speed, slamming himself into Dean's hips, while their moans only grew louder. The angel through his head back in a wave of pleasure, riding Dean like he was a mechanical bull. Dean gripped Castiel's length in his hand, pumping roughly.

They came at the same time, moaning each other's names. Cas slid off Dean and onto his side beside the hunter. They were both sweaty and gasping for breath. Dean pulled Castiel into his arms, tucking the angel's head under his chin.

"I'm sorry the other me never found the courage to do this," he whispered.

Cas wrapped an arm around the hunter's chest. "Then find the courage when you go back. Zachariah wanted you to change things. Change this."

Dean knew the angel was right. He kissed the top of Cas's head and then closed his eyes, exhausted.

Outside Castiel's shack the Dean of that time stood outside the window. He had come by the see how things had gone. A sad smile played across his face when he saw them curled up together. The look on his past self's face caught him by surprise, it was a look he himself had not seen in years. It was a look of pure happiness.

* * *

><p>Dean was now back in his time, many thoughts weighing on his mind. He could not become that hard version of himself, willing to sacrifice anyone for the cause, but unwilling to let anyone in. He had to call Sammy, they had to reunite so that maybe that course would not be the only possible future.<p>

But before he did that there was something else he had to do.

Castiel stood by the door of the motel room, watching him curiously. It was strange to see such a subdued Castiel after the drug fueled orgy loving one of the future, but Dean didn't love this one any less.

Dean was sitting on the edge of one of the beds, and he motioned for the angel to sit on the one across from him. The angel sat and looked at Dean with expectant blue eyes.

"Cas, the future taught me a lot of things. But there's one thing I learned there that I think we should talk about."


End file.
